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Recently I was sitting down in lunch with my friend the Catholic Schoolgirl, she was telling me about Easter when I realized something. The Easter Bunny comes then. I asked my self, "Why is it that Jesus died for our sins and all I get is a chocolate bearing bunny? I want Jesus to come and give me some candy!" That got me started, did you ever realize that Christmas is Jesus' birthday and we get a fat gut that molests little dwarves (which is redundant any way) and rides around with flying reindeer on a sleigh. How the heck did this happen? When did society say "Forget Jesus and give us a skinny old man invented by the Coca-Cola company! No wait, make him fat, it looks 'jollier'." My childhood is ruined and I can fall asleep without thinking about the fat guy at the mall that likes having little kids sit on his lap. I'm scared.

   -Cory Wilson

Page Updated: 06/16/00